I have come to a realization that, I do really miss her. I hate waking up and realizing; she isn't mine anymore. I hate it. I hate it so much. Why do I always suffer? Does she feel this too? It's next week now. Time check: 9:39pm. Time really does go by fast. I genuinely sliced the skin of my ring finger. It genuinely hurts. I felt it slice and it felt like it was deep, because I felt my bone. Genuinely, traumatic. I don't even wanna think about it. My blood was drooping alot. It genuinely still feels sore. It's genuinely disgusting. I hate seeing blood. My blood, actually. Time check: 10:19pm. I've been busy watching people do jig 2 in TikTok. It itches the right spot of my head. It's actually so beautifully good. I love everything about it. It's my new obsession now. Time check: 11:19pm. It genuinely still hurts. Tell me why the time check thing also had 19 minutes? Crazy. Anyway, opened a batman kindertoy, and I got what I've wanted. Batman, himself. Not the Batman(her) I really want though. Sadly. Annoyingly. Crap, man. It genuinely hurts. Whenever I'd straighten my ring finger, it would be genuinely sore. It genuinely physically and mentally hurts. My mental health is in pain and now my physical self is now in pain? Maybe I really am a dumbass. Things never go well for me. Never does. It's good, but then, reality hits me like a bullet.